| And just like that, she’s gone. She’s moved away to a much
better place. I still can’t believe she’s really gone. She’s not here for me to
hold, to kiss, or to even look at. One day, we’ll see each other again, and
because of this, we will be much stronger than before. But for now, we have our
own goals to achieve. It still amuses me how some of my friends still can’t get
over the fact that I have a girlfriend. Most of them aren’t even aware of it,
period. I’m just glad that there are people that are happy for me, unlike one
person in particular, whom I will get into in greater detail. Every time
somebody asks me about our situation, I take a really long, deep sigh before I
go on practically forever about what has occurred thus far. Saving you the
trouble (and my breath), I will tell you about these events in a nutshell. This
may seem like a long post, but trust me, if I had left in each and every
detail, it would have been much longer. So without further ado, I present The
ZoomKiZoom Story.
As with most people, ringing in the new year is a time for
self-awareness and a fresh start. Coming off of a couple of broken hearts last
year, 2007 was a time of redemption for me. Classes were back in session, so
perhaps I could get my mind off of things. Since I was still unemployed at the
moment, I had to “work” at my mother’s nail salon after class. During the first
week of classes, I go back to the salon and see all of the regular workers
keeping busy as usual. Then, I noticed a young lady across the room sitting at the
table in the corner, which has been left unoccupied for quite some time. She
seemed older than I was and very quiet as well. Like the other workers at the
salon, I didn’t bother to talk to her because I wouldn’t know what to talk
about anyway. Either way, I still thought she was cute. Later that day, as the
salon was closing, a tall Caucasian man walks in and the girl enthusiastically
walks over to the man and they leave together…They strike again. For those who
aren’t aware, I’m not too fond of tall white guy/short Asian girl
relationships, not that I’m racist or anything, but it is a rapidly growing
trend around the country and it was because of this that I was heartbroken in
the first place. Well, it wasn’t like I was in love with the girl. I didn’t even
get a name, so I didn’t pay much mind to it. Still, she was cute. I nodded to
myself, shrugged my shoulders, and closed the salon for the night.
A couple of months have passed and it seems as though the
girl was still working at the salon. She only worked certain days, though. Suddenly,
CCP goes on strike and I couldn’t go to class, so I had to be at the salon all
day. Awesome. Coincidentally, the girl was at the salon all day as well. Every
day that she worked, she would always get picked up by the aforementioned tall
white guy. However, one day, my sister, Ngoc (the bitch) calls me and asks if I
can drive the girl home, since the tall white guy could not that day. I didn’t
mind, but again, I had no idea what to talk about if I had to. I wasn’t even sure
of how good her English was or if she knew that I didn’t know that much
Vietnamese. We get in the car and we actually hit it off. I found out that her
name was Duong and she had just moved from Vietnam
to Philadelphia
a few months ago. I was quite impressed by her English considering the short
amount of time she has been here. Turns out that she was attending CCP as well,
which was why she was also at the nail salon all day. I also found out that she
was actually younger than I was, about a year and a half to be exact. I then
asked the burning question which plagued my mind since day one: whether or not
that tall white guy was her boyfriend. Surprised and slightly appalled, she
said that it wasn’t her boyfriend. Rather, it was her “cousin’s” husband. Relieved,
we both laughed it off, I more so than she, of course. I dropped her off at her
house and I was happy, not only because she didn’t have a boyfriend, especially
a tall white guy, but now, I had somebody to talk to at the salon. I’ve made a
new friend! *insert Zelda treasure acquisition sound effect*
I was actually glad to go to “work” now because I would get
to see Duong. She has actually made work interesting by passing notes to me and
playing Sudoku with me. As time went by, we became closer. As we became closer,
I’ve taken over the tall white guy’s…*ahem*, I mean her “cousin’s” husband’s
duties of escorting her home after work. I started liking her more with each
passing day. I felt as though I had to confess my feelings for her as soon as
possible before it was too late, something that has happened to me one too many
times. I told her that I liked her, but at the moment, she didn’t feel the same
way for me. I was disappointed, but at least I wasn’t heartbroken. I was glad I
got it off of my chest as soon as I did because if I would have waited, I would
have gotten hurt much more. We were still friends and we still talked, so
nothing was lost. On Easter Sunday, my family and I went to my sister, Tu’s
house. (the middle one; no label) We were all actually having a good time. This
was the first time we’ve actually bonded in quite some time. The day was
looking great, until my sisters, Ngoc and Huong (Mrs. Darnell Ford) pulls me
aside and wanted to talk to me. I thought to myself, “Great, another lecture.”
But it was anything but. They actually wanted to talk to me about Duong. Turns
out that Ngoc has been friends with Duong’s “cousin” for quite some time, and
they have even talked about Duong and I becoming friends. My sister then told
me that the “cousin” told her that she saw Duong making out with somebody else.
I was shocked and disappointed, as I still had feelings for her. Later that
night, I confronted her about it and she said she had no idea what I was
talking about. I still did not know Duong that well, so I would not know if she
was capable of lying to me like that. She asked her “cousin’s” husband about it
and he said that it was a lie to prevent me from dating her. Judging by my
sisters’ reaction towards her, I had a feeling that the “cousin” was bad news,
but this was beyond my expectations. I did not think anybody would go this far
just to keep me away from somebody, let alone a mere “cousin.” It didn’t
matter, though, because we were still friends (and I still had feelings for
her).
The only time we would usually get to hang out was during
school since people can’t really hang out during work. We would talk about our
families, our friends, and all of the above. One day, she mentioned that she
will be moving to California
in the summer. I didn’t believe her at first and thought she was just playing
around with me. Apparently, she was telling the truth. I was lost for a split
second, but I figured that I might as well make the best of her stay here in
Philly. She was still unfamiliar with her surroundings and I wanted to be there
to help her in any way that I could.
I still drove her home from work everyday and it seemed as
though things were fine at the moment. Somehow, the “cousin” still found out
about me driving her home and was none too pleased about it. Just when I
thought she couldn’t get any worse, she didn’t want me to drive Duong home anymore.
Instead, she actually wanted her to take the subway. We all know how unreliable
and dangerous SEPTA can be, especially at night. She would rather have Duong
risk her life taking the subway than at least feel much safer with me driving
her home. She could have gotten lost. Not only was the “cousin” a liar, she was
very inconsiderate. She was downright evil.
At that moment, it was obvious that the “cousin” did not
want me to be a part of Duong’s life and I felt that we could not go any
further with the relationship. I did not want her to get too attached to me
since she would be moving anyway. I still wanted her to know how I truly felt
about her, so I kissed her on the lips. She was surprised and speechless. I
didn’t think she knew how to get home by subway, so I decided to take the
subway with her that day. On the train, we held each other as if it was the
last time we were going to be able to do this. We got out of the subway and I
was going to wait for the bus with her as well, but the “cousin” was waiting at
the bus stop. Of course, I didn’t want to be seen with Duong, so I tried to
leave. Before I left, I gave her a hug and she actually returned the favor by
kissing me on the lips. As she was walking away from me, I was lost once again.
Would that first kiss be our last kiss? Was her walking away symbolic of her
walking away from my life? I didn’t know what to think. All I could do is wait
and see what would happen. The next time I saw her was just like any other time we see
each other; only, I didn’t want to get too close to her. However, knowing how
we truly felt about each other, we couldn’t help but be close. This would be
our little secret that everybody but the “cousin” would know. We were
officially a couple. I will admit, it was a bit awkward calling somebody my
girlfriend at first, but I’ve gotten used to it. I was very satisfied, but I
believed that the most reassuring thing about our relationship was others’
acceptance. From family, to friends, to even fellow classmates, I was really
happy to know that there were people out there to support us. Of course, there
was still one person in particular who was on the other side of the fence, and
that person was the “cousin,” or so we thought…
The “cousin” has been trying to get Duong to work at a
different nail salon. She didn’t want to leave our nail salon, but she didn’t
have a choice. It was especially hard for my mom to let her go, but she had to
do it. With classes out for the summer, I didn’t think I would see her again. But
she told me where the new nail salon was so I could visit, and I did just that.
I hate to admit it, but she was working at a much better nail salon, in a much
better neighborhood, getting a much bigger paycheck, et cetera. My only gripe
was that it was relatively far from where she lived, but I digress. I was so
happy to see her again, even under the circumstances. I actually got a manicure
and pedicure for the first time. It was not as glorious as I expected, but it
was still special. I would not get a pedicure from anybody else, though. I
charmed most of the ladies at this new salon, and they became supporters of our
team. We were spreading the love. On Memorial Day, Duong still had to work, but she got off
early. She didn’t want to wait for the bus considering how slow they run on a
holiday. I went to go pick her up and since we had time to kill, we wanted to
do something before she went home. We couldn’t think of anything and we haven’t
had an opportunity to simply just spend time with each other, so we stayed in
my car and embraced for a while. When it came time for her to go home, I tried
to start up my car but it wouldn’t. We were getting paranoid because we thought
we were stranded, but worst of all, Duong would not be home on time. We
panicked as her “cousin” kept constantly calling her cell phone. She didn’t
want to let her “cousin” know that I was with her, so she didn’t pick up. Thankfully,
I called my friend, Rich, and see if he would give me a jump. Our knight in
shining armor (or a bright yellow shirt, rather) arrived and successfully
started up my car. We immediately get into my car and I drove her home as fast
as I could. I dropped her off and drove to my friend’s house to catch a breath.
As I was driving, Duong called me and said that her “cousin” wanted to talk to
me in person. Apparently, Duong told her why she was late. Given her reputation
and what she has done to sabotage our relationship, I didn’t know what to
expect of this confrontation with the “cousin.” I gave it much thought until I
finally decided to go to their house and have a talk with her. If I wanted to
continue on with this relationship, I had no other choice. I had to get past
this road block (or in this case, this cock block). I was greeted at the front door by Duong and I stood by the
doorway, waiting for the “cousin” to come downstairs. She emerged (or
submerged?) from the staircase. Preparing for the worst, I was waiting for her
to start bitching at me to high hell. Unexpectedly, it was the complete
opposite of what I thought would happen. She actually sat down with me and
talked to me in a rational manner. She mentioned how she was actually glad that
I was dating her niece (which would make her the aunt, but for some odd reason,
Duong called her “cousin”; I guess it stuck on to me). She didn’t mind that we
were going out because she said she could relate when she was our age. She even
invited me to have dinner at their house whenever I could. I was quite
flattered as I let out a huge sigh of relief, but I still felt that there was
something suspicious going on. After hearing about what kind of person she was
from my family and what she had done to keep Duong and I apart, there had to be
something more to this. I gave her the benefit of the doubt, though, because
Duong and I were much more comfortable with each other after the talk. The next
day, however, as I was working, my sisters, Tu and Ngoc, came to the salon and
told me that the “cousin” told them that she cursed me out that night, which
was what I thought would’ve happened but absolutely did not. This made me
question her integrity once again and I had lost all respect for her. Since the “cousin” had offered, I would occasionally have
dinner at their house. Not only that, we have even gone on double dates with
the “cousin” and her husband. Things were starting to look good but, as usual,
it hit another downward spiral. Just like it was back at my salon, I would pick
up Duong after work, but she would not go home right away. Instead, I would
park at the corner of her house and we would just hold each other. Sometimes,
we would even fall asleep. One day, I parked at the corner and we both close
our eyes. The “cousin’s” husband was walking his dog when he saw us, but did
not pay it any mind. Twenty minutes later, we started kissing. The husband
walked by again and noticed this, so he went on to tell his lovely wife about
it. Finally, Duong went home and so did I, thinking that everything was
alright. Duong called me later that night and said that she got in trouble
because of the kissing. The “cousin” asked her why she was kissing me. Isn’t
this the same person who said that she didn’t mind that we were dating? She has
even resorted to calling Duong names and putting her down. Not only is she a
hypocrite, she is a damn bully. What kind of person calls their relatives names
just so that they could feel bigger and better about themselves? Some guardian
she is. Up to this point, Duong kept quiet about everything her “cousin” put
her through, because she was too scared to say anything. She still could not
say anything, but she did the next best thing and wrote her “cousin” a letter
explaining everything and asking her why she treated her the way she did. They
had a very long talk about it, Duong then decided that we should have a head
start on our individual lives, as if she had already left. That also meant that
we could not go out with each other anymore, at least not while the “cousin”
was still around. While I was disappointed, I understood her reasons and I was
willing to do whatever it took for us to have a better future, even if this was
the case. Besides, the “cousin” would be leaving a few days before Duong would,
so we could at least spend time with each other during her last few days in Philly.
My mother wanted Duong to have dinner with the family before
she moved. With the “cousin” gone, I figured that would be a given, but Duong
still decided to ask the “cousin” anyway. Without hesitation, the “cousin”
denied her request because she didn’t want her to see my family again. She even
told her that my family hated her. I was furious about this. Why couldn’t she
at least say goodbye to the people who taught her how to do nails and offered her
a job? It wasn’t a matter of my family hating Duong. They actually liked her.
We just aren’t too fond of the “cousin” and this wasn’t helping her one bit.
The “cousin” was just jealous that we liked her niece and not her. Perhaps if
she wasn’t so evil, things would have been more in her favor.
I made other plans for Duong, including a second attempt at
a dinner with my family. This time, she would ask the “cousin’s” husband if she
could eat with us, but the husband told her to ask the “cousin.” Ugh. Duong
decided not to go eat dinner after all. Not a problem, right? Well, the husband
felt inclined to tell his wife that Duong asked if she could eat dinner with
us. The “cousin” proceeds to call Duong and makes her feel guilty, telling her
that she regretted taking her in and has even threatened to kick her out of her
life. Duong felt alone because the “cousin” was the only family she had in America and
with her gone, she felt as though she had nowhere else to go. She didn’t want
to go back to Vietnam
and she didn’t want to stay with my family because she didn’t want to be too
dependent on them, especially my mom. She decided to apologize to the “cousin,”
even though she didn’t deserve it. The “cousin” accepted, so Duong would be
going to California
after all. As much as I didn’t like this, I was glad Duong wasn’t going to end
up being stranded.
Of course, my plans with her went down the drain, but at
least I got to spend her last day with her. This was the day that actually
counted. I cooked her breakfast, walked along the Delaware River with her,
watched movies, made funnel cakes, brought her to both of the nail salons she’s
worked at to say her goodbyes, and I’ve even got her to play Pop’n Music for a
little bit. There was so much more I wanted to do but couldn’t get around to
due to time constraints. This day seemed way too short and I wished there were
more hours in a day. This would be the last time I would see her, because I
wasn’t able to take her to the airport. The “cousin’s” husband took her instead
and I didn’t want to show my face around him. After what he did to get Duong
into trouble, I can’t trust him anymore. I dropped Duong off at her house and hugged
and kissed her for the last time. I couldn’t believe it. It felt so surreal. I
didn’t know when I would see her again, if ever. This wasn’t the goodbye I was
looking for. Then again, I wasn’t really looking for any goodbye to begin with.
Duong’s parents sent her here to have an education, not to
have a relationship. But we made a promise to each other that once we graduate
from college and become successful, we could be together once again. That could
be a very long time from now, but I’m willing to wait for her because that’s
how much I care about her. I just hope things go smoothly over in California and the “cousin”
treats her much better, like a human being. As for me, I’m ready to take the
next step in this long journey ahead of me. She’ll always be in my heart and I
look forward to the day I see her again. That is my drive, my motivation. I can
do this. Though things didn’t exactly turn out the way I wanted it to, I’m glad
things went the way they did because if it hadn’t, I wouldn’t have gotten to
meet her in the first place. Some things happen for a reason and there was a
reason she came into my life. I needed somebody to love.
Anh yeu em.
[C-FOO] |
If you hadn't noticed, I've been in a bad mood lately. 2008 has been a struggle for me, mainly due to the fact that I broke up with my first and only girlfriend early in the year. Mind you, neither her nor I did anything wrong to cause this break up; it was the situation that she was in. Let me elaborate.
Anyway, how's everyone doing (and by "everyone", I mean the ten people that are still on this thing)? There's really no shame in that, it just goes to show how dedicated you guys are. Kudos. I wish I had the kind of drive I used to have when I would post every single day, even when nothing happened on that day. I look back at my older posts and can't help but be appalled by the way I used to type. At the same time, I found it to be hilarious. I've certainly come a long way from when I first started my Xanga back in 2002 to today. It's such a shame that Xanga has been overshadowed by the ever-so-popular MySpace, which eventually got a taste of its own medicine, courtesy of Facebook. I kept my Xanga for two reasons: the memories and the Wall of Smiles. Imagine how big it would have gotten if I kept taking pictures of everybody I met... 
<~~Haha, these faces would be the third reason.
